1992 11 07 Smiths Morrissey
SINGLE YOUR LIFE
WRITE SAID FRED
EDITED BY THE INFO-MOUS FRED DELLAR
A RECENT post provided a note from one Neil from Birmingham, who wrote: “In a recent Thrills section, there was a piece in which it was claimed NME had made Moz’s 45s Single Of The Week on ten occasions. Can you list these singles, please?”
The answer is that Morrissey has never quite achieved ten such desirable plaudits, even with his Smiths output chucked in. In all probability, the Thrills piece was penned by our Bob Holness expert. Even so, the task of trawling through Steven Patrick’s tally of NME singles reviews seemed a fascinating one. So, after hours in the vaults, the Write Said Fred team (just me, actually) came up with the COMPLETE MORRISSEY SINGLES REVIEW FILE! - now offered for your delight and dissection. In particular, note Swells’ review of ‘Everyday Is Like Sunday’ and marvel at the man’s Nostradamus-like powers. Normal service will be resumed next week.
THE SMITHS
‘Hand In Glove’"THE SMITHS ride up ‘Hand In Glove ’ to knock me from my own gallows. With a paucity of effects they seem to piece the cool of a Julian Cope/Teardrops sensitivity with a certain vigour that only us young ones can adopt. Morrisey’s (sic) voice invocations just rise above the fuzz of treble. Truly a new Bunnyman.”
(David Dorrell 11 /6/83. The single was reviewed as just part of a threesome, along with Seona Dancing's ‘Move To Lose' and The Orson Family's ‘You Shake My Soul')
‘This Charming Man’
“THIS IS one of the greatest singles of the year, a poor compliment. Unique and indispensable, like ‘Blue Monday’ and ‘Karma Chameleon'- that's better!" (Paul Morley, 12/11/83)
‘What Difference Does It Make’
"NOT SO good as ‘Charming Man’ say some, but I’d say better. A wailing, wordless hook from your man Morrissey hovers ghost-like over a rubbery rockabilly beat.”
(Paul Du Noyer 21/1/84 - who made it a joint Single Of The Week along with Cyndi Lauper’s ‘Girls Just Want To Have Fun’ and Echo And The Bunnymen’s ‘The Killing Moon’)
‘Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now’
(released 2/6/84)
NO REVIEW, since the NME was in the midst of a lengthy NUJ strike!
‘William It Was Really Nothing’
“THE SMITHS are impossible to love unless you wish to mother Morrissey. The main man-child’s self-adoring ennui sticks in the craw once you realise that this is what he's going to be doing on his death bed."
(Tony Parsons, 25/8/84)
‘How Soon Is Now’
“FOR THE most part, Morrissey is the Hilda Ogden of pop, harassed and hard done-by. I guess what seems like meat to one man sounds like murder to another."
‘Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now’
(released 2/6/84)
NO REVIEW, since the NME was in the midst of a lengthy NUJ strike!
‘William It Was Really Nothing’
“THE SMITHS are impossible to love unless you wish to mother Morrissey. The main man-child’s self-adoring ennui sticks in the craw once you realise that this is what he's going to be doing on his death bed."
(Tony Parsons, 25/8/84)
‘How Soon Is Now’
“FOR THE most part, Morrissey is the Hilda Ogden of pop, harassed and hard done-by. I guess what seems like meat to one man sounds like murder to another."
(Gavin Martin, 9/2/85)
‘That Joke Isn’t Funny Anymore’
“MORRISSEY TRIPS out again on mellow folkiness, while Johnny Marr plays with a plectrum plucked straight from heaven."
(Cath Carroll, 13/6/85)
‘Shakespeare’s Sister’
“A BRIEF, brusque Diddleybuzz, a determined disturbing of the air after the balmy psychedelic fog that was the beauteous ‘How Soon Is Now’. All this and Pat Phoenix on the cover."
(Danny Kelly, 16/3/85)
‘The Boy With The Thorn In His Side’
"SEEMS LIKE Morrissey himself gives up the songs half-way through when he stops the vocal and uses up the rest of the needletime with yodelling."
‘That Joke Isn’t Funny Anymore’
“MORRISSEY TRIPS out again on mellow folkiness, while Johnny Marr plays with a plectrum plucked straight from heaven."
(Cath Carroll, 13/6/85)
‘Shakespeare’s Sister’
“A BRIEF, brusque Diddleybuzz, a determined disturbing of the air after the balmy psychedelic fog that was the beauteous ‘How Soon Is Now’. All this and Pat Phoenix on the cover."
(Danny Kelly, 16/3/85)
‘The Boy With The Thorn In His Side’
"SEEMS LIKE Morrissey himself gives up the songs half-way through when he stops the vocal and uses up the rest of the needletime with yodelling."
(Richard Cook, 21/9/85)
‘Bigmouth Strikes Again’
“IT'S AS disappointing as baked beans for Christmas dinner. OK, so the main parts are all present and correct, but does the light of Sandie's life still expect us to swallow it whole?' And now I know how Joan of Arc felt,’ he oscillates mildly. On the evidence, Joan Collins seems more likely."
(Danny Kelly, 17/5/86)
‘Panic’
“THIS IS the first Smiths single that uses a different tune and manages to avoid both ropey introspection and clever-clever adolescent poetry. Now it seems my goading has borne fruit."
(Steven Wells, 26/6/86)
‘Ask’
“THE WORD is gnomic. Perhaps I should join all you thousands in pondering those inscrutable epigrams. ‘Ask ’ sounds lovely in the kinda-folk, kinda-high-life manner we know and love so well and that’s enough for me.”
(Mat Snow, 18/10/86)
‘Shoplifters Of The World Unite’
"THIS RECORD might be the stuff of tragi-comedy, but the funereal tune with cumbersome guitars and world-weary singing kills any irony that may be hidden in the lyrics.”
‘Bigmouth Strikes Again’
“IT'S AS disappointing as baked beans for Christmas dinner. OK, so the main parts are all present and correct, but does the light of Sandie's life still expect us to swallow it whole?' And now I know how Joan of Arc felt,’ he oscillates mildly. On the evidence, Joan Collins seems more likely."
(Danny Kelly, 17/5/86)
‘Panic’
“THIS IS the first Smiths single that uses a different tune and manages to avoid both ropey introspection and clever-clever adolescent poetry. Now it seems my goading has borne fruit."
(Steven Wells, 26/6/86)
‘Ask’
“THE WORD is gnomic. Perhaps I should join all you thousands in pondering those inscrutable epigrams. ‘Ask ’ sounds lovely in the kinda-folk, kinda-high-life manner we know and love so well and that’s enough for me.”
(Mat Snow, 18/10/86)
‘Shoplifters Of The World Unite’
"THIS RECORD might be the stuff of tragi-comedy, but the funereal tune with cumbersome guitars and world-weary singing kills any irony that may be hidden in the lyrics.”
(Michele Kirsch, 31/1/87)
‘Sheila Take A Bow’
“AN ADEQUATE rather than a particularly inspired Smiths single that still shreds the rest of the week’s pop dross. With Candy Darling on the cover, this is, as always, the sleeve of the week.”
‘Sheila Take A Bow’
“AN ADEQUATE rather than a particularly inspired Smiths single that still shreds the rest of the week’s pop dross. With Candy Darling on the cover, this is, as always, the sleeve of the week.”
(Donald McRae, 18/4/87)
‘Girlfriend In A Coma’
"HIS GIRLFRIEND is hovering between life and death, but Morrissey's catch vocal seems non-commital about the whole thing, while the overall feel evokes shadows of The Beach Boys and other early '60s teen vocal groups.”
‘Girlfriend In A Coma’
"HIS GIRLFRIEND is hovering between life and death, but Morrissey's catch vocal seems non-commital about the whole thing, while the overall feel evokes shadows of The Beach Boys and other early '60s teen vocal groups.”
(Jay Strongman, 15/8/87)
‘I Started Something I Couldn’t Finish’
"THIS IS a fairly pointless bit of posthumous whingeing with some horrible guitar playing from Johnny Marr. Morrissey ought to get himself a string section and stop swanning about pretending to be Melvyn Bragg.”
(Ben Thompson, 7/11/87)
‘Last Night I Dreamt Somebody Loved Me’
‘I Started Something I Couldn’t Finish’
"THIS IS a fairly pointless bit of posthumous whingeing with some horrible guitar playing from Johnny Marr. Morrissey ought to get himself a string section and stop swanning about pretending to be Melvyn Bragg.”
(Ben Thompson, 7/11/87)
‘Last Night I Dreamt Somebody Loved Me’
“A SINGLE taken from The Smiths’ worst LP, ‘Last Night' reaches no new ground whatsoever. A melodramatic, almost operatic, intro slides into an average Morrissey-Marr number that is two and a half minutes long and a ton too light. The Queen is clearly dead here and Johnny Marr’s not looking too bright either.”
(Neil Taylor, 12/9/87)
‘This Charming Man’ (reissue)
“IT'S A truly magical song, one of the greatest records ever made. It’s incredibly idiosyncratic but incredibly self-confident within that. It’s a bit unfair to make single of the week because it isn't new - it's a piece of art history. We’ll call it Single Of The Decade instead.”
(Guest reviewer Brett Anderson of Suede, 8/8/92)
‘How Soon Is Now’ (reissue)
‘How Soon Is Now’ (reissue)
APART FROM ‘Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now’, this was the only Smiths or Morrissey newie or reissue not to receive an NME review. It had to happen some time.
‘There Is A Light That Never Goes Out’
“ONE OF the best records ever made. But you knew that already ...”
(John Mulvey, 17/9/92)
MORRISSEY — SOLO
‘Suedehead’“STEPHEN STREET’S music has a crispness to it that The Smiths never managed. As Morrissey sings:‘I’m so very sorry ... ' his vocal hits a pitch that turns your stomach with queasy delight. It makes you feel vulnerable and provokes emotions you've forgotten about.”
(James Brown, 20/2/88 who made it Single Of The Week along with The Wedding Present’s ‘Nobody’s Twisting Your Arm’)
‘Every Day Is Like Sunday’
"WATCH OUT Stazzer. What with writing about burning people at the stake, skinheads and killing disc jockeys and such like, you've got to be careful that you don't attract a Sham Army style of following and end up like Jimmy Pursey. Think on, lad."
(Steven Wells, 4/6/88)
‘The Last Of The Famous International Playboys’
“A HESITANT rock pastiche. ‘Panic’ without the magnetism and the blinding self-confidence. Lyrically it either castigates or canonises the Kray twins, I can't tell which. I would still chain myself to a disused railway line in Bacup for him, but the lad can do better.”
‘The Last Of The Famous International Playboys’
“A HESITANT rock pastiche. ‘Panic’ without the magnetism and the blinding self-confidence. Lyrically it either castigates or canonises the Kray twins, I can't tell which. I would still chain myself to a disused railway line in Bacup for him, but the lad can do better.”
(Stuart Maconie, 4/2/89 - who rated it as ‘Enigma Of The Week')
‘Interesting Drug’
“I STILL ache with a longing to know just what Morrissey's minions see in the man, what special stardust quality does he possess to endear him so closely to their palpitating hearts. It's a finely crafted pop single, of that there can be no doubt - but that's all there is to it."
(Edwin Pouncey, 22/4/89)
‘Ouija Board, Ouija Board’
“THIS IS the sort of thing that ’60s pop stars made when they wanted to go serious after two flawless years of smiling in Mandarin jackets and Cuban heels. A dull, fey whine that would never see release unless the singer had a track record.”
(Ian McCann, 18/11 /89)
'November Spawned A Monster'
‘Interesting Drug’
“I STILL ache with a longing to know just what Morrissey's minions see in the man, what special stardust quality does he possess to endear him so closely to their palpitating hearts. It's a finely crafted pop single, of that there can be no doubt - but that's all there is to it."
(Edwin Pouncey, 22/4/89)
‘Ouija Board, Ouija Board’
“THIS IS the sort of thing that ’60s pop stars made when they wanted to go serious after two flawless years of smiling in Mandarin jackets and Cuban heels. A dull, fey whine that would never see release unless the singer had a track record.”
(Ian McCann, 18/11 /89)
'November Spawned A Monster'
“LIKE ALL great pop acts, Morrissey repeats his one tune endlessly. To have one flopped single, Mr Laughaminute, could be considered unfortunate. To have more suggests a distinct drying up of the ol' creative gastrics. There's an upturn on the way, Mobbydor, and sad and whining, masochistically melancholic grey canvasses of wangst ain'tgoing to cut it anymore.”
(Steven Wells, 28/4/90)
‘Piccadilly Palare’
“THE BLUSHY, double-jointed dandy flirts with under-age prostitution, more interested in social despair than the everyday details. He’s much better at this than belly-dancing in the desert, covered in clay. With Suggs on guest spoken vocals and production credits to Langer and Winstanley, Moz has at last found his true cellmates in Madness."
(James Brown, 13/10/90)
‘Our Frank’
“A PLEASANT surprise. Mr Misunderstood's freshest vinyl confection since ‘Suedehead’, a similarly streamlined pop gem. The tune is jaunty and unfussy, scooting around strange sitar-sounding violins, crashing through Lennon-esque reverb for the chorus, before diving into fathomless melancholy, when His Master's Voice spirals to a bonkers Billy MacKenzie-style finale.”
‘Our Frank’
“A PLEASANT surprise. Mr Misunderstood's freshest vinyl confection since ‘Suedehead’, a similarly streamlined pop gem. The tune is jaunty and unfussy, scooting around strange sitar-sounding violins, crashing through Lennon-esque reverb for the chorus, before diving into fathomless melancholy, when His Master's Voice spirals to a bonkers Billy MacKenzie-style finale.”
(Stephen Dalton, 16/2/91)
‘Sing Your Life’
"I'D MAKE this Single Of The Week if it didn't seem such a wilfully perverse thing to do. ‘Sing Your Life' is one of the most toe-tapping moments from the rather lumpy ‘Kill Uncle 'set. Morrissey has a lovely singing voice and even a Cure roadie will find the tune charming."
(Stuart Maconie, 6/4/91 who actually did award the Single Of The Week plaudit)
‘Pregnant For The Last Time’
“BLIMEY! JOE Orton arm-wrestles with Gene Vincent and Morrissey wins! A lovely little music-hall ditty, courtesy of Mark Nevin, knocked into shape by Boz Boorer and his rocka-rocka-rocka-rockabilly guns. The diehard Smiths fans who’ve been turning their backs on Morrissey over the last couple of years would be wise to give this a spin and do jerky, twisty, dancing type things in their front room. ”
‘Sing Your Life’
"I'D MAKE this Single Of The Week if it didn't seem such a wilfully perverse thing to do. ‘Sing Your Life' is one of the most toe-tapping moments from the rather lumpy ‘Kill Uncle 'set. Morrissey has a lovely singing voice and even a Cure roadie will find the tune charming."
(Stuart Maconie, 6/4/91 who actually did award the Single Of The Week plaudit)
‘Pregnant For The Last Time’
“BLIMEY! JOE Orton arm-wrestles with Gene Vincent and Morrissey wins! A lovely little music-hall ditty, courtesy of Mark Nevin, knocked into shape by Boz Boorer and his rocka-rocka-rocka-rockabilly guns. The diehard Smiths fans who’ve been turning their backs on Morrissey over the last couple of years would be wise to give this a spin and do jerky, twisty, dancing type things in their front room. ”
(Terry Staunton, 20/6/91)
‘My Love Life’
“CATCHY, ROMANTIC, endearing. The best one he’s made in a longtime, I'd say. I’ve not cared for the last few at all, but this one I'd definitely play on the radio. I mean, it sounds like a Smiths song, which is no bad thing.”
(Guest reviewer John Peel, 5/9/91)
‘We Hate It When Our Friends Become Successful’
“START YOUR sobbing, this is by far and away the ex-Smith's WORST single. Played alongside it, ‘Ouija Board' sounds choppy and inspired. Sure, the ambiguous title allows 30 seconds of salacious conjecture, but that double-bluff ‘Ha ha ha ha ha ha’ non-chorus scores a direct miss, and the sound of five men bashing around in the darkness in search of a tune merely drains you of the will to live.” (Andrew Collins, 2/5/92, who actually made it Single Of The Week- Not!)
‘You’re The One For Me Fatty’
“MORRISSEY IS not a musician, he patently doesn't even like music. Nor is he a particularly smart lyricist; just an Alan Bennett fan who got lucky. If he's really clever, he could do a Quentin Crisp and get a gimmick (like refusing to wash his cutlery and groin for a decade). Just a suggestion, and surely preferable to his current state of living death. ”
(Barbara Ellen, 11/6/92)
A CHRISTMOZ GIFT FOR YOU
HOW WOULD you like a nifty, highly collectable Morrissey promo single for Christmas? Daft question. Of course you would.
Mozzer promos usually come with natty retro labels with sleeves to match. And the new single, ‘Certain People I Know’/ 'Jack The Ripper’, will prove no exception to the rule, coming in a special promo sleeve which, so the Parlophone press office reckons, “Has artwork similar to that which we used to use on T-Rex singles.”
We have some 20 copies of these promos for disposal, so if you feel life won’t be the same without one, just jot down the title of Moz’s latest solo album on a postcard and wing it to: MOZ PROMO COMPETITION, c/o Write Said Fred, NME, 25th Floor, King’s Reach Tower, Stamford Street, London SE1 9LS. Maybe one of the first 20 correct entries to be drawn from the office Christmas sock will be yours!
‘My Love Life’
“CATCHY, ROMANTIC, endearing. The best one he’s made in a longtime, I'd say. I’ve not cared for the last few at all, but this one I'd definitely play on the radio. I mean, it sounds like a Smiths song, which is no bad thing.”
(Guest reviewer John Peel, 5/9/91)
‘We Hate It When Our Friends Become Successful’
“START YOUR sobbing, this is by far and away the ex-Smith's WORST single. Played alongside it, ‘Ouija Board' sounds choppy and inspired. Sure, the ambiguous title allows 30 seconds of salacious conjecture, but that double-bluff ‘Ha ha ha ha ha ha’ non-chorus scores a direct miss, and the sound of five men bashing around in the darkness in search of a tune merely drains you of the will to live.” (Andrew Collins, 2/5/92, who actually made it Single Of The Week- Not!)
‘You’re The One For Me Fatty’
“MORRISSEY IS not a musician, he patently doesn't even like music. Nor is he a particularly smart lyricist; just an Alan Bennett fan who got lucky. If he's really clever, he could do a Quentin Crisp and get a gimmick (like refusing to wash his cutlery and groin for a decade). Just a suggestion, and surely preferable to his current state of living death. ”
(Barbara Ellen, 11/6/92)
A CHRISTMOZ GIFT FOR YOU
HOW WOULD you like a nifty, highly collectable Morrissey promo single for Christmas? Daft question. Of course you would.
Mozzer promos usually come with natty retro labels with sleeves to match. And the new single, ‘Certain People I Know’/ 'Jack The Ripper’, will prove no exception to the rule, coming in a special promo sleeve which, so the Parlophone press office reckons, “Has artwork similar to that which we used to use on T-Rex singles.”
We have some 20 copies of these promos for disposal, so if you feel life won’t be the same without one, just jot down the title of Moz’s latest solo album on a postcard and wing it to: MOZ PROMO COMPETITION, c/o Write Said Fred, NME, 25th Floor, King’s Reach Tower, Stamford Street, London SE1 9LS. Maybe one of the first 20 correct entries to be drawn from the office Christmas sock will be yours!
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